Privacy

Last updated: 27 September 2026

Draft. This policy is written to match what the site's code actually does. It is awaiting attorney review before launch, and it is updated whenever the code changes.

Clod, at clod.chat, is a parody website run by Mpyr Media LLC. The character answering inside it is called Doofus. It has no accounts, no login and no advertising. This page describes everything it does with data.

What we do not collect

• No accounts, no profiles, no passwords.
• No cookies, and no third-party analytics, trackers, scripts or fonts.
• We don't use advertising or analytics trackers. We count requests on our own server, with no identifiers.
• We do not store or log the messages you type, or the replies you get.
• We do not sell, rent or share personal information.

Your conversation

Your conversation is held in your browser. When you use the "borrowed brain" setting, the text of your recent messages is sent to our server and forwarded to an AI provider so it can generate a reply. Our server passes it straight through and keeps no copy of it.

The provider is Anthropic, which processes the text on our behalf to produce the reply. Anthropic's own policies govern what it does with API traffic; please read them if that matters to you. When you choose "his own brain", or when the site has run out of its daily budget, nothing you type leaves your browser at all.

Please don't share sensitive personal information in chats. It is a joke website.

Your IP address

To stop one person spending the whole site's daily budget, our server counts how many AI replies each visitor has had today. It does this by combining your IP address with today's date and a secret value, running that through a one-way hash, and storing only the result. The raw IP address is never written down, and the stored value changes every day and is deleted after two days.

Cloudflare, which hosts the site, processes requests on our behalf and may log network-level information under its own policies.

Counts, not people

We keep a small set of daily totals so we can tell whether anyone is enjoying this: how many visits there were, how many people sent a message, how many shared a card, how many joined the email list. These are numbers per day with nothing attached to them. Not what they said. There is no identifier, no session, and no way to connect one count to another or to you.

Things stored in your browser

We use your browser's local storage, not cookies, to remember your effort setting, your brain setting, a joke flag and some fake conversation titles, whether you have dismissed the email invitation, and whether you have told us you are under 18. This stays on your device. We cannot read it. Clearing your browser data removes it.

Share cards

Share cards are drawn inside your browser and handed straight to your device's share sheet or downloads. The image is never uploaded to us and we never host anything you wrote.

The email list

The email list is for adults. Before we show you the form we ask what year you were born. That answer stays in your browser and is never sent to us. If your answer means you could be under 18, we show no form and collect nothing.

If you do subscribe, your email address is passed to beehiiv, which runs the list for us. Subscription is double opt-in: nothing is sent until you confirm by clicking a link in an email. Every email includes an unsubscribe link, and unsubscribing takes effect immediately. We do not store your address ourselves, and our server never logs it. We keep, with beehiiv, the exact wording you agreed to and when you agreed to it.

Coming-soon notifications

If you ask to be notified about one of the fictional products on our About page, which product you picked is stored with your subscription as a tag, and nothing else. None of them will ship.

Who helps us run Clod

• Cloudflare: hosting, the daily counters and the rate limits.
• Anthropic: generates some replies, under its own policies.
• beehiiv: the email list.

Children

Clod is only for people 18 and older. We don't knowingly collect data from anyone younger, and the email list is age-screened before any address is collected. If we learn we have, we'll delete it.

Your choices and rights

Because we hold no account and no identifier for you, there is usually nothing for us to look up, change or delete. If you have joined the email list you can unsubscribe from any email, or ask us to remove your address. Depending on where you live you may have additional rights over personal information; write to us and we will do what the law requires.

Changes

If we change what the site does, we will change this page and update the date at the top.

Contact

Mpyr Media LLC
contact@mpyrmedia.com
Postal address available on request, and included in every email we send.

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